Monday, April 2, 2012

Continually Bewildered

I decided early last week to go and cover Ironman 70.3 Texas in Galveston yesterday. Not because of Lance. But, rather, doing so would keep my options open, so to speak, to cover May's Memorial Hermann Ironman Texas.

I'm glad I did. I did my normal thing: did what I had to to cover the race (i.e. the professionals) to write a story for Texas Runner and Triathlete magazine, but then went back out on the course and cheered on and supported a plethora of friends that I'm fortunate enough to have.

I'm continually amazed - and thankful, of course - at those who consider me a friend.

Why? Well, it is because many are "friends", depending on the definition, I guess, of someone who accused me of stalking and harrassment. It is the farthest thing from the truth, especially when you can count the number of times that I actually spoke to that individual in person over the preceding three years on both hands.

And why would I do anything as stupid as put my livelihood on the line and affect the support of my daughter over somebody who used my goodwill without offering much in return - as far as friendship.

When the accusation was levelled at me, the Monday after Thanksgiving, I naturally sought out the law to see if anything would have met the legal definition in the state of Texas. It didn't. I consulted a friend who has been in law enforcement and is currently a private investigator and he provided some pretty good, solid advice.

One of the things that I researched is that when you believe that someone is stalking you is that you tell all of your friends to stay away from that individual.

So when you have people that you believe to be friends with the accuser continue to reach out and approach you, it makes you wonder, which I'm sure that person intended.

If that's how they get their jollies, so be it.

It is pathetic and sickening, to be quite honest.

I tried repeatedly to distance myself first from that individual many times, after realizing that they couldn't or wouldn't ever meet the standard set forth by my very best friends - or even my simplest friend.

However, they kept making attempts at reaching out, for whatever reason.

Why? Because I was a nice, genuine, honest individual who would help pretty much anybody that I thought needed it. Maybe? Maybe not? Who knows for sure? Only they do. They never shared that with me.

So when I'm out at a race - which I go to less and less because of all of this - where I come in contact with people who I believe to be friends with that individual, I am forced to be guarded in my communications because I have to ask myself, "What do they know, if anything?"

And when they are pretty friendly and open, and I begin to extend trust to those individuals again, I tell myself, "Must be nothing."

Honestly, it's a horrible way to live. All because I was on the receiving end of information, that I didn't seek out, from one person, who basically created havoc in the already strained communications with the person that accused me of stalking.

They offered up information that wasn't necessarily shocking, but some of which questioned that person's actions toward me as being something as less than genuine.

Things first came to a head the day after the Fourth of July.

After a dust-up in mid-June, there were some communications while I took my daughter on vacation to Kona and Honolulu. In between, I had offered a race entry to a Fourth of July race that I did finish line announcing for. The person told me that they would have to check their schedule and get back with me.

They never did. I didn't push the issue, but I was a little burned up on race day that they didn't take the courtesy to at least tell me, "Thanks for offering up the entry, but I ran on Saturday and I need to get in a ride this extended weekend."

After receiving a pretty lame e-mail that afternoon that they just realized that they had forgot to communicate, I learned through the evil world of Facebook that they had decided to go for a ride that morning. No big deal, in a sense. I got it, but it would have been common courtesy to have stated from the beginning that they had no intention of ever really accepting the race entry.

When I boldly challenged them, I got taken to task for how I felt over them having taken me for granted months and months before. Where and how I did so, I assume, got communicated to them from the individual that "offered up information".

Twice in the fall, before the stalking accusation, and twice in late February/early March involving activities surrounding The Woodlands Marathon, I received communications from the person who "offered up information".

It was startling, to me. They knew this stuff. So why even attempt to reach out to me? They had already caused enough strain and stress in my world. Why create more?

So after ignoring them and not responding to texts (their e-mail had already been blocked as well as Facebook), why didn't they just realize that I really have no desire to communicate with them - at all?

Still on Saturday and Sunday in Galveston, they tried on multiple times to initiate contact; however, I know that they could tell that I really didn't want to have anything to do with them. When I arrived on Saturday, that person and another individual were crossing where I a was and there was no way to avoid them.

My question is: Why can't they be like their friend and a former acquaintance of mine and just go away?

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